Category Archives: Happiness

Communication, Consideration, Happiness, Happiness, Relationships

Flirting

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It turns out, I am a total Romantic.
Old Fashioned.

Yes, It is my old fashioned British upbringing rearing it’s head……..

Yes, I like to have a Gentleman open the door.
Move my chair, help me with my coat….

With the Metoo# movement, I feel sorry for men today, the messages are SO mixed, it is hard for them to know what is acceptable and what is not.

Add to that all the rhetoric about Gender Norms, with many identifing themselves as Binary. One young lady I know was very rudely lectured by someone that she was “THEY”, and did not want to be referred to as a ‘SHE”…. Sorry, but if you were born with boobs, YOU ARE A GIRL.

Then there is all the nonsense about Political Correctness.

PUHLEESE………

Can we get back to some semblance of elegance, refinement …..MANNERS??? RESPECT?? DECENCY?? CONSIDERATION OF OTHERS???

Oh yes, back to FLIRTING!!

I am NOT suggesting by any stretch of the imagination that I want to go back to the Victorian Era and be a kept woman, I would
be murderous within 5 minutes…..GET OUT OF MY WAY!!

I love my independence, and the freedom of the lfe I have lived, travelling the globe on my own……meeting extraordinary people in fabulous places…..

One has absolutely NOTHING to do with the other………

Today was an interesting day. I went out to breakfast with a girlfriend and brought along my significent other, to a girly breakfast.
And no, three was NOT a crowd…….we spent 2 hours talking non stop and laughing.

And, here it comes, I was naughty…….i flirted with our male server……..yes, he has served us many times before, and knows exactly
What we will be eating……he pays attention…….and jokes with us……

And yes, I flirted with him in front of my significent other……..openly, shamelessly, with all 4 of us laughing…….and the more we laughed, the more flirtatious he bacame, and me back to him!!! Several tables around us ended up laughing at our antics……

There was an overabundance of laughter, and before we left, my girlfriend and I were presented with fresh hot baguettes as a take-away gift!!!

When we got out to the street, our car was blocked by a delivery truck, and our parking meter had died.
But, and here it comes,…..a police car had chased someone who he stopped a few car lengths in front of said truck…..what amazing timing!!!
So, I went up to see the officer, smiled, and asked if he could please come and ticket the truck once he was finished ticketing the car.

Police officers really like it when you joke with them and smile, just like everyone else…..so there was laughter and smiles.
He helped us back up our car onto the sidewalk and stopped traffic so we could get out, and with a fat smile, promised me that as the
Truck had been blocking us for well over 15 minutes, the driver would be presented with a big fat ticket. I thanked him, then
I blew him a kiss, and he was laughing as we drove off……

Did I mention, my significant other was driving the car!!! He was totally complicit……..and laughing……..he had just witnessed me flirting
For the SECOND time in an hour……

And then I did it again with a Priest…….in front of him, again……got my hug and kiss…..

YES……..

Flirting can be fun, it can be harmless, it can make someone’s day.
It can make someone feel good about themselves, appreciated, wanted……

And NONE of it in a sexual, inappropriate way.

Apparently it is a lost art, in having conversations with people about flirting, it appears very few have any inkling whatsoever how to do it, or even how to receive it. This is very sad.

Business, Communication, Consideration, Happiness, Integrity

A Life in Lockdown

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Take someone who is used to travelling up to 6 months of the year, meeting people all day long, then lock them inside their home for a year and what do you get???

A wicked case of Covid35….aaaaagh!!! my skinny jeans look at me aghast!!! To think I used to fit in them all!! They are horrified at my appearance, and shrink in horror….
(as if they weren’t tight enough)…!!!!

I consider myself extraordinarily fortunate. There is a very sweet, gentle, loving puppy who has offered her services to entertain, and is rarely more than a few feet away, providing endless kisses and love. If she could purr, she would.
Add to that an equally lovely life partner, and divine company is always close by.

Cooking is NOT my thing, Luckily having spent most of my life with one foot within the Asian community, I have learned to craft fast, healthy, tasty meals, 10 minutes from refrigerator to table.
Butternut squash Thai coconut soup, Tom Yum Seafood, Ratatouille, Mushroom Chicken, and occasionally, disgustingly rich Italian something, dripping in cheese, OK, so NOT Asian, just decadent.
A life partner who can actually follow a recipe…..(totally NOT my thing) and whips up decadent, wonderful meals.

Working from home is lovely, no traffic, no icy roads, no parking issues, but not being able to meet clients face to face and walk around is just NOT the same. Body language, facial expressions, micro expressions, eye contact, totally missing. Watching people interact with others, simply impossible.

Being doubled over in laughter, non-existent. Learning from extremely bright, extraordinarily creative executives……totally lacking.

Lots of time for contemplation and certain realizations. I see acquaintances adding Facebook friends as though those numbers actually matter. In fact, I find myself doing the exact opposite.
I have probably deleted over 40% of the people who were there…were they friends?? Acquaintances??? Taking advantage?? Or the big question…..do they actually make you laugh???

With death hovering outside the door every time you go out to do an errand due to all the selfish mask less people about, the concept of social distancing totally nonexistent, the concept of being locked in your house amplifies the desire to speak with friends who make you laugh, make you feel good, support you. People who are TRUE friends.

One such friend is in London, years have gone by, yet she answers the phone and I hear her voice booming down the line, and am instantly smiling. We speak easily for over an hour each call, endless laughter, sooo many subjects…..everything from Theatre, politics, Restaurants, food, endless……I hang up the phone, and am anxiously awaiting the next time we speak.

People complain about feeling isolated, but how many have reached out to those living alone and given them a smile?? A feeling of being less alone. A phone call is not expensive, but can have a huge impact on someone’s life. I do something utterly absurd with one friend, I send her pictures of Chelsey’s elegant toes, her bouncing, her eating poached salmon….with ridiculous subtitles. She knows we are always thinking about her, and are available instantly should she need us…..

Another British girlfriend rang up the other day, apologetic and embarrassed about her silence. But she knew she was safe, not being judged, as she described her horrific year. I told her off for not reaching out sooner. Made her promise she would call more often when she was upset.

Spend your time being kind. There is SO much evil and nastiness out there. From internet trolls to people who hate themselves and take it out on others.


Make sure you shower, wear clean, nice clothes, feel good about yourself. Read, educate yourself with all the extra time. Eat well…(well, maybe not TOO well)


Make someone laugh and feel needed.

The days won’t feel so dark.

Business, Consideration, Happiness, Happiness, Quality

Living Through a Pandemic

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As an observer of life, I find it fascinating that sometimes those making the loudest pronouncements and taking up the most space intellectually are actually the ones living the saddest lives.

In life, one makes certain key decisions as how one chooses to live their lives, and I made mine very early on, and followed my dream, mostly in silence. People I know would lose sight of me for weeks or months on end, my excuse for my absences was that I was working. That was certainly partly the case, and working in several cities simultaneously is a challenge, now, did I meet ‘x’ in Toronto or Chicago?? Yikes!!!

I have endured endless nasty gossip from women with too little to do with their sad little lives other than gossiping ruthlessly about people they know little or nothing about. The more I have heard of the gossip, the further away I ran…..

Living life well is the best revenge ,doing it on your own dime, even better…

One of the extraordinary gifts I have enjoyed is making amazing friends who are scattered around the world. As we are locked down in our homes we are seeing empty streets with a proliferation of wild animals wandering aimlessly about…..air less polluted, and quiet….

Taking the time to call some of these individuals has been wonderful, no one is in a hurry to go anywhere beyond the kitchen, and the ability to spend an hour on the phone with no disturbances has been brilliant!!!, but even better, the laughter has been incredible !!!

But there have been some less attractive observations, which is seeing certain people showing their true colours.

From cyberbullying on Facebook, to acting out like spoiled, pathetic children, showing a distinct lack of class or consideration for others. The refusal to wear a mask in public, and bragging about their unwillingness only shows their ignorance and selfishness, and willingness to put the lives of others at risk.

There are those who interrupt others and do not let them speak, behaving as though they are all knowing and all seeing. Sit back and think about it. They are showing who they REALLY are. The man who claims to be from an upper class British family, putting on airs and a fake English accent ,screaming people down when he does not agree with them, and throwing temper tantrums like a bratty 2 year old. No one from a decent family would EVER behave in such a disgraceful fashion…..
Then, to continue the thought, if he is from such an amazing background ,why is it that he has returned to Britain twice in the last 30 years, and stayed in horrid B & B’s instead of with relatives having homes in Knightsbridge, Holland Park or Mayfair????
Last thought on this dreadful person, is realizing that over the years I am unable to remember ever sharing a really good laugh. That is sad.

Quiet observation of several individuals who make the most pronouncements has shown that, for the most part, they do NOT live particularly well, have not travelled, and in fact, are extremely limited in enjoying a cross section of friends and acquaintances.

Many have expressed feelings of isolation, however, the last time I checked, the telephone actually works in more than one direction. So, they are miffed because WE don’t call them, but when is the last time that THEY actually reached out??? When did they make you laugh or give you any type of pleasure to result to you smiling uncontrollably??

So, who are your friends?? More importantly, who do you still wish to keep as friends?? Unless one is extremely insecure and needs to feel that there is always an entourage, are they really friends or simply taking up your time and space, and worse, risking your life to satisfy their insecurities???

The ability to sit back and look from the outside in gives one extraordinary clarity.

Highly recommended during these uncertain times…

Being safe and careful is far more important than having selfish, uncaring people around you. It is your LIFE.

Do these individuals bring you laughter?? Joy??

Having too much time on one’s hands allows for introspection, contemplation and evaluation …..one must be able to look at oneself coldly at the same time as evaluating others. A frightening thought, but certainly the opportunity for a serious awakening.

To my amazing friend in London who suggested some of the changes to this BLOG, thank you for MANY years of joy and laughter, have an incredible birthday and wishes for many, many more.

Business, Consideration, Happiness, Integrity, Listening, Security

And then the World Stood Still

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This is an extraordinary moment in time which will forever be etched in the memories of the entire population of the world. It is inconceivable that in the space of one week over 6 BILLION people across the planet simultaneously locked themselves in their homes with but a slight warning from some so-called world leaders.

The world came to a silent and abrupt halt.

Bustling streets around the world normally filled with people became instantly empty, videos taken by the brave, and by drones flying overhead bear witness to the odd seagull seeking lunch at his favourite restaurant and questioning the absence of food and humans.

‘But WHERE are my French Fries.???.” he asks quizzically…unused to the void of humans and potential food…..

It is extraordinary to see scenes of major international cities such as New York,, Paris, London, Rome, Milan devoid of human presence, and the silent return of wildlife, wandering around world monuments with no fear of human threat…..

We are fortunate that some internationally renown medical specialists stepped up to calmly explain a pandemic in simplistic terms to try to calm an otherwise terrified world.
This is the time when we truly see both the good and the bad of humanity. The medical and emergency professionals risking their own lives every moment of every day to try and save lives, at the same time as some truly arrogant politicians behaving in unconscionable ways trying to deflect and blame others for the crisis. Deaths spiraling out of control due to lies and gross incompetence, others stepping up ,speaking in measured, calm, logical words to try to explain something unexplainable.

We have heard of 6 degrees of separation, but unfortunately it is more like 10 feet of separation, as studies have proven that micro droplets travel much farther than previously believed.

As a long time student of human behaviour, I must admit to being speechless at some of the arrogant, selfish, ignorant behaviour I see around me. Neighbours with children who are clearly home from school for a reason, totally defying the rules of self isolation and separation. Some of them out socializing every day, large groups of children playing outside, their parents at home, not thinking of the risks they are putting on their children and themselves. One person can infect 1000.

People in shops and on the street unwilling to distance themselves from others, and when confronted, becoming belligerent and publicly insulting those who politely request that they step back….

This is NOT a joke.

This virus does not see age, race ,colour, socio-economic situation ……it is ruthless and will attack and kill anyone and everyone it encounters.

My small contribution is my ability to collect and collate information from around the world, and to distribute it first to my Doctor friends around the world and to my friends and acquaintances…If by providing information I can save and protect lives, then I have been successful….

So, PLEASE..don’t be selfish,

STAY HOME.

If you go out, COVER your mouth and nose.

Stay 10 feet away from others.

WASH your hands a LOT.

Wash your shoes and purchases when you arrive home.

Reach out to your friends by telephone, NOT by text and email….it is NOT the same.

SLEEP, READ, catch up on projects, and mostly

STAY ALIVE.