What ever happending to manners??


YES, I am absolutely ranting about this subject again, hence, ROSLYNSRANTS.COM.

As a tall, blond, well dressed woman, with a handbag in my hand, and a coat on my back,  do I actually look like a doorman to you??  Do you have ANY idea how many times I have held open the door for the person directly behind me and had 10 rude people push their way through, NONE of whom had the good manners to either acknowledge me in any way or better,  say Thank You??

Yes, I was brought up in an extremely strict British household, NO, it was not fun. As a child I was forced to learn how to use ALL the cutlery on the table, elbows off the table, sit still, do not speak until you are spoken to, sit still for hours,  no carrying on, …. it was excruciating, but I recognize it as one of the greatest gifts as an adult. I learned to behave.

Grace, elegance, eloquence, manners, consideration for those around us, regardless of social position, seem to be something of the past, the way most people hold their cutlery and eat today is absolutely repugnant. At least 50% of the population do not know how to use a knife and fork, how to use a napkin, NOT to blow your nose at the table, and even worse, put the used tissue on the table…….

And then there are other little things…such as putting one’s pinky in the air when drinking tea……..seriously??   soooo pretentious…….

Spearing food and chewing loudly, mouth open, and talking so that we see all the half chewed food spraying about…..UGH…UGH….UGH!!

Watching white people in a Chinese or Japanese restaurant is even worse…….they are loud, snapping their fingers at the staff as if they are their personal servants, with absolutely NO idea as to Asian etiquette…….and NO, I DO NOT care if you are white, try and be respectful of your environment.  Etiquette is etiquette.  …  KEEP YOUR HANDS OUT OF THE FOOD….it is considered the height of bad manners…….

What happened to helping someone with a heavy bag??

Helping someone to cross an icy sidewalk??

Given that I am a woman, why is it that I am the only one extending an outstretched hand to someone trying to cross an icy sidewalk??  Opening doors???  Waiting politely in line for my turn, not bursting into the line, expressing my  perceived importance in a loud, arrogant voice……..??

What happened to integrity? Decency??   Manners??  Consideration of others?? NO ONE is in such a hurry that taking 2 seconds to be courteous is an imposition. If all these so-called busy people were actually remotely busy,  other than their  make believe importance,  they would not have the time to binge watch TV. Yes, when you speak so loudly on your mobile phone we know that you spent 5 hours watching TV last night……

I have an acquaintance, certainly no longer a friend in any stretch of the imagination, who is embarrassing and disgraceful. Always ranting on about aging gracefully, then always sticking everyone with the bill, and expecting to be driven around without EVER contributing to gas or parking.

Another one invited my significant other out to a restaurant for his birthday, ordered drinks, no, we did not imbibe, insisted we try several items on the menu, carried on with the waiters like he was a big shot, then stuck us with the bill, AGAIN.

No one seems to understand old fashioned ideas like Birthday cards,  Sympathy Cards, sending flowers, Thank you notes, responding to RRVP’s on time, yet ironically, these are the same individuals grasping desperately for the wonderful invitations to posh parties and cocktails……..they almost think their presence is so magical that manners are of no consequence. Bringing a gift to an afternoon tea, dinner party, cocktail party, birthday party, also appears to be a lost art. ….   And actually considering the taste of the host , well, that would be too much to ask.  Did it EVER enter the minds of these rude, rude individuals that entertaining is not cheap or easy??   All the alcohol, and food you consume costs money and must be prepared. There is prep work before, during and after any social gathering. If it is held in someone’s home, they probably cleaned it within an inch of its life before you arrived, and will do the same thing afterwards. I have been to extraordinary parties all over the world, some with an insane number of staff ……do you think they are FREE????

The  very least you can do is BRING or SEND a GIFT.  Arriving consistently empty handed is not only rude, it is extremely disrespectful. 

On line rudeness is a new phenomenon,  social media such as Facebook is full of hateful, mean individuals posting cruel hurtful snippets in response to the posts of utter strangers. Does it give the some perverse sense of power to inflict such cruelty??  Do they not realize just how easy it is to find out who they are and where they live???

Today, with the rise in violence around the world, WORDS KILL.

Then, of course, there are the shop keepers who see someone enter their shop and say loudly, “ I see an important client, you will have to go…..” you are totally correct, the person in front of you will NEVER become an important client, you just totally offended them, it is soooo easy to go elsewhere…..

The purpose of manners is to treat others as you wish to be treated……..how simple is that??

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